116,000 Length — in words — of the initial draft submitted to Wilderness Press.
722 Miles hiked in the course of researching and field-checking the guide-in-progress. (Coincidentally, that’s the same number of track miles in the NYC subway system.)
9 Rattlesnakes encountered (Coche, Roma Potrero, 40-Mile Wall, Howard Creek, North Fork Lockwood Creek, Upper Romero, [undisclosed], Horn Canyon, and Horsethief).
1 Mountain Lion (followed immediately thereafter by 1 near heart attack!). En route to San Rafael Mountain from McKinley Saddle.
1 Bear (Topatopa Bluff; at dusk).
1 Bear skull (Upper Rancho Nuevo Canyon).
1 Skunk. (Well, Masha and Lilly encountered it; I ended up paying the price when they came back to share the news — Cienega Camp, East Fork Santa Paula Canyon.)
3 Condors spotted (Red Reef/Sespe confluence; Sespe/Tar confluence x2).
3 Golden eagles (including the one who targeted me for attack! True story! — Timber Canyon @ Hines, Three Sisters, and Mission Pine Ridge).
63 nights spent on the ground.
2 Nights spent — on separate occasions — at our most-frequented trail camp(s) (a tie; Madulce and McKinley Spring). ZK was along for all four of those alternately great/miserable nights.
44 Percent of total mileage for which said Resident Science Officer was along for the ride/pain (~318 miles).
79 Percent of total mileage for which the uber-hund was along for the adventure (~570). ZK wins on a per-foot average, otherwise the uber-hund gets the nod.
40 Approximate number of bottles of single malt that saw me through.
435 Cost — in US dollars — of Adventure Pass/Park Service/BLM/Bureau of Reclamation fees I’d have incurred in the past 12 months alone were it not for the Federal Interagency Pass (guide-related and not).
80 Cost — in US dollars — of the annual Federal Interagency Pass (recommended!).
1 Mascot found (by ZK) and returned to its home.
3 Number of times inclement weather on the trail made for a serious reschedule/reassessment of the day’s/trip’s goals (Madulce No. 1, Alder Creek, Toad Spring).
Countless Number of times — divided by seven — that heat caused a change of plans.
7 Number of rock art sites visited over the course of researching the guide.
1 Total number of sites actually discussed in the guide.
8221 Elevation — in feet — of the highest trail camp in the Los Padres. (Sheep Camp, one of my Top 5 personal favs, and my wife’s No. 1 Favorite.)
30 Approximate number of lime bars consumed at Full of Beans in Ojai.
6108 Miles driven to and from various trailheads, ranger meetings, campgrounds, and shuttling over the past two years on behalf of the guide.
2 Courses of prednisone.
14 Lookouts or lookout/AWS sites visited in the past 20 months.
0 Pot grows encountered (amazing; ran into many in the years previous).
10 Approximate number of tri-tip sandwiches consumed at Reyes Creek Bar & Grill.
3 Number of tri-tip sandwiches enjoyed by the uber-hund.
6 Consecutive years that Li’l G has joined the annual spring trek to Lily Meadows/Chumash Wilderness.
100 Approximate number of times I questioned my/our/anyone’s sanity along any given stretch of trail.
1 Number of times the uber-hund second-guessed a route, and turned back.
3 Number of seconds afterward it took for me to realize she was right and follow her back down.
96 Routes detailed.
25 Maps rendered.
4000 Weight — in metric tons — of this monkey that’s now mercifully off my back! \m/